30 Day Writing Challenge | Day 6


Day 6: Five ways to win your heart.

1. Be yourself.
2. Be nice.
3. Have a passion.
4. Be understanding.
5. Smile.

I was a little apprehensive about writing this one. As a single girl, I think it’s clear that I don’t even know what I really want in a guy, let alone how one could “win my heart”. I’m the kind of person that believes that love is something that never ends, and since I’m not with anyone and I don’t have those feelings of love for anyone, for me its safe to say that I’ve never been in love. At least not the relationship sort of love. I love my close friends, and my family, but I don’t feel like I’ve ever loved any boyfriend I’ve had. I know that’s not the way everyone sees this whole “love” thing, but it is the way I’ve worked it out for myself.Β With that said, I decided to list qualities that would push me a little closer to falling for a guy, which I suppose would mean he would be the one to “win my heart”.

I don’t think there’s anything better than when someone is truly being themselves. I think its completely obvious when someone is acting differently or not being true to themselves. I’ve written about bad experiences of men acting ridiculous on dates before, and I can’t help but be a bit apprehensive about going out with anyone new, because I just don’t want to deal with it again. The last thing I want is for someone to act different than who they are just because they think it will make them seem cooler or because they think it’s how I want them to act. Personally, I’ve never been one to go for the big muscly guys, or the ones that talk down to other people, because I’m just not like that. I’m at the point in my life where I really want to find someone that I have a lot in common with, someone that I can really build a friendship and a relationship with, and if the person I’m talking to isn’t being themselves, how can I possibly have a hope of building anything with them?

Being nice should just be common sense, but from what I’ve seen in the dating world so far, in this city at least, it doesn’t seem to be as common as I think it should be. I’ve encountered men that were mean to the staff in the places we went, men that were rude to their family and friends, etc. I don’t want to limit this to just men, because that’s obviously not the case, but that’s the only reference point I have. All I ask is that the guy I’m with treats the people around him with respect. Being kind can be the simplest thing, and also the most attractive. I’m not asking for you to be Gandhi or anything, but a little kindness and respect can go a long way.

Have a passion in life. I don’t mean like sexual passion or anything like that if that’s what you’re thinking, although I suppose that’s somewhat important too, but I’m not getting into that here. I mean a passion as in a drive for something in your life. Whether you’re passionate about writing, sports, books, travelling, science, anything; I just want you to have a passion for something. I’m saying you as if you reading this right now could be the guy for me, who knows, maybe you are, but I suppose I should say “him” instead; I want him to be passionate about something, whatever that may be.

I’m not a perfect person by any means, I have a million and one flaws to go along with all of the great things about me, and I need a guy that can be understanding about that, just as I’ll be for him. Being understanding of someone else’s feelings, views, opinions, dreams, lazy days, insecurities, and everything else that someone goes through is important, not just in a romantic relationship, but in any relationship. Friendships, family relationships, work relationships, it all takes understanding and kindness even. I can assure this mythical future boyfriend that wants to “win my heart” that I will always be just as understanding as I’d like for him to be.

No one can ever look better than they do when they’ve got a smile on their face. Knowing that the person you’re with and spending time with is happy and smiling is a lovely thing. Seeing someone genuinely smile at me can brighten my whole day. There’s only so much that can be said about smiling, I feel like this is the most self explanatory of all the things on my list here, but that doesn’t mean it’s not important.

Some of these posts in this challenge make me feel a bit uneasy, as though I’m making myself out to be this crazy demanding person when it comes to relationships, but I’m really not. I feel like everything I’m looking for is fairly basic as far as relationship “requirements” go. I think the biggest thing here is that everything I’ve written down as something that the ideal man needs to possess to “win my heart” are all things that I have to offer him as well. I can’t promise that I’ll always be pretty or have a nice body, or that I’ll always have it all together, but I can promise that I’ll always be a genuine person and be myself, I’ll always be nice, I’ll never lose my passion for the things I love in life, I will always be understanding, and I will do my best to have a smile on my face as often as possible. What more can you ask for really?

Are there any things that someone can do or qualities that they should possess to win your heart?

I hope you’re doing well, where ever you are in the world, and I wish you all the best.

-Lexie Xx

23 thoughts on “30 Day Writing Challenge | Day 6

  1. Well, the last one counts me out. The judge was very clear I’m no longer allowed to smile after every baby within a five mile radius simultaneously bursts into tears when I do. πŸ˜›

    I agree with the second, third, and fourth the most of all. The second is particularly important to me as there are enough people out there who won’t be nice to you (for whatever reason), and really there’s no need to continue that trend. You might as well just be nice, be friendly, and be decent to your significant other (or anyone for that matter).

    The third is also a pretty big one for me as I am a passionate person myself. I don’t really mind if the person in question isn’t massively passionate about things- just that they have a spark for something. Whatever it is- gaming, art, music, cats- it just needs to be there. Sometimes with the people I’ve dated I’ve found that they replace their passion with blind devotion to me. Which is bad for several reasons.

    That said, the people I’ve loved over the years have been almost always different to me. We had different interests, we did different things- yet I loved the person like nothing else. I guess, when all is said and done, I’m not a very traditional person when it comes to relationship standards.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha, well maybe you should skip the smiling step here then πŸ˜›
      To each their own, I love that we all want different things out of a relationship and out of a partner, it just further pushes the face that there must be someone special out there for all of us.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Aww, right after I got my teeth all pearly white and all. πŸ˜›

        I think it goes to show that, despite what we might be told, or led to believe, we’re all unique and so we look for unique people that fit with us. It’s pleasant. One of the few universally pleasant things in life.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. πŸ™‚
        Absolutely, I love that even if someone doesn’t like me, or if I’m just not what someone is interested in, it doesn’t mean I won’t find someone that is looking for someone just like me.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I enjoyed reading your post, Lexie. Be honest. Two words that Billy Joel sings about and that really is hard to find. People wear masks to hide themselves, thinking if someone knew the real him or her, then that person would turn away. It’s taken me a long time to accept a “so what?” stance: if people turn away (and they have, and it hurt; I won’t kid you), then they’re not the people I want to be around. Oh, and don’t wear a mask. Be you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks so much! See, I’m still quite scared of the “so what” stage, and to combat that fear, it seems that I’ve just stopped seeking people out haha. I don’t know if that’s the best approach to it all, but it is how it’s happening now!


      1. I agree with Tim that you’ve done a great job describing who you want in your life. I believe people meet for a reason, and mostly when I’m not looking. πŸ™‚

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Hi Lexie… from an old-guy of thirty years wed, you’ve done a great job defining ‘that someone’ you want to share your life; not perfect, but perfectly suitable! Cheers Tim

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Hi Lexi,
    I like your style. And I really liked the part about the smile. A real genuine smile goes a long way to your heart. But I have to mention, never worry about having an idea what you want in a guy or who you would like to meet, because the more clear you are the closer you will get to it and the faster the universe will bring it to you. And never feel guilty about that, because you are not cirizing guys that are not who you want them to be, they are just not for you, but they might be a perfect guy for someone else. So for me is all about, what my taste is, not what is write or wrong. The muscly shallow guy might be perfect for another girl. Anyone has their own life lessons to learn, and being in a relationship with a certain guy is part of that. So feel free to want what you want and ask for it πŸ™‚

    P.S. I love your 30 day challenge, I wish I had the courage to do it!



    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks so much Lulu! I love this! You put it perfectly, there really is no need for me to be worried about the fact that someone may not be right for me or that I’m criticizing guys, it is all a personal preference sort of thing.
      You should really give it a go! I’ve found this whole challenge quite entertaining! πŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Agree with Lulu. Love the 30 day challenge too! The big quality for me is someone who is open to dating someone with a disability and a “pimp limp” and really just someone open minded to begin with. Like finding a needle in a haystack sometimes. But outside of that, completely agree with your 5 (though I need to work on smiling more myself).

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I love this. You will find just the right person for you that loves your “pimp limp”, and I think finding an open minded person is something that is quite high on my list as well.
      I hope you are able to let your smile do the talking more often! πŸ™‚


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